Proof

Dear son,

i’m currently watching you drag yourself across the un-vaccuumed floor, chewing on my iPod, pulling yourself up by the volume knob of the speaker in order to pull down the CDs off the console, and wondering if I’m a bad parent.

I’m absolutely certain that many, most even, parents would be telling you “no no no”. “It’s dirty on the floor” and leaping towards you for fear of you hitting your head. None of our furniture is secure, and we have not babyproofed this place in the slightest.

So why am I sitting here with a cup of tea, carefully watching you (ok and writing a quick blog post too)?

Like everything with this mothering adventure, I may say something different tomorrow. I’m wondering if I’m lazy, but I don’t think so, because I leaped up when a tub of blank DVDs was about to come crashing on your head, and I draw the line at you pulling empty glasses off the table.

My thought, today, son, is that I want to create a yes environment. Something about the thought of yelling no no no all day long just grates me. I’m not striving to have a squeaky clean experience, if you pull the books off the shelf, so be it. So long as it isn’t dangerous, a little mess is fine.

Furthermore, and this may really label me a bad parent, even if something isn’t completely safe, I just think, how on earth are you ever going to learn what’s safe and what’s not, son, if you don’t have a chance to try it out?

My case in point is a moment ago, you tried to pull yourself up on the coffee table. When it started to slide, you gingerly sat yourself back down and moved on to the command center. Same thing with the curtains. They didn’t feel too steady. (Unfortunately, the volume knob isn’t budging. Yet.)

Like I said, when in ten minutes from now you fall and crack your head open, I reserve the right to write an entirely different post tomorrow.

And I worry about what other parents will think of me, letting my child get down in the dust, and the dog hair.

This, however, is how I feel right now, at this moment.

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